Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
She has the best kind of daddy issues
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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