I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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