my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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