8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize