Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
a search helicopter?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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