just tell him i said nine months
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
