it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
