Nicole vs. Life
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How's work?
Spinning.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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