Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Dicks are not precious.
Randomize