i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
The Olympian is in my bed
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
