so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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