Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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