i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I am naked and annoyed.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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