I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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