i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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