from now on my penis is your penis
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
