EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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