someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
So squirting runs in the family.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I believe in your delicious
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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