This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
