so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize