Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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