There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize