We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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