Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Randomize
