ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
