I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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