He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
my phone needs a breathalizer
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
