Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize