Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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