I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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