my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
