Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
