How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize