Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
