hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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