I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
