we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize