Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
