STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
