Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
