In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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