You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
