The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Randomize
