can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
