Having a random hookup so left but love u
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
