It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
