she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
