She went from zero to smokin in five shots
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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