even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
