What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
it's like iHOP with fire
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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